A Past Refrain Read online

  Haley giggled. "I give you two thumbs up for bravery for even asking him."

  "He must know by now that you and I are friends. You know what, he should know that you are my girlfriend!" Jayce sat up in the hammock; it swung wildly at his sudden movement. "I am going to tell him."

  "No." Haley looked alarmed. "My dad is sensitive about boys and stuff. You know that."

  "But for God’s sake, why?" Jayce asked.

  "Because," Haley stressed, "my older sisters both got pregnant before the end of high school."

  "Both of them?" Jayce asked.

  "Yes," Haley sighed. "Beatrice got pregnant pretty young; her boyfriend was a pastor's kid too. Both parents came together and arranged the marriage so fast your head would spin. That was eight years ago. I had to listen in at doors to hear what was going on. No one would tell me why Beatrice was crying around the place like her world was ending."

  Jayce laughed. "Really?"

  "Yep." Haley picked up her water bottle and had a sip. "Beatrice and Leon are unhappy together but both parental units would have a fit if the word divorce was even mentioned.

  "My other sister, Cher, named for the singer because I think my mother loved her work secretly, did the worst thing."

  "What?" Jayce asked, getting into the story.

  "Last year she went to camp and sneaked out without telling anyone. So happens that she came home pregnant. She hid it from our parents until after graduation and she wouldn't say who the boy or man was who knocked her up, so my parents pretended that my mother was pregnant. That's why they moved to Montego Bay and my dad gave up his congregation in Kingston. The plan was when the baby was born my mom could pretend that it was hers."

  "Are you serious?" Jayce asked, wide-eyed. "Where is Cher now?"

  "She took her baby and ran," Haley said. "She was having none of the lie and apparently the guy wanted his child. So you can guess that since I am the youngest and last girl, I am being watched like a hawk.

  "My father is terrible at home. I grew up hearing that boys are scum. My mother stands by and does nothing while I am being disciplined for the least little thing, especially if I so much as mention a boy's name. I tell you, if I were different I'd rebel to teach them a lesson."

  Jayce subsided back in the hammock and held out his hands to her. They held hands tightly.

  "I want to marry you, Haley, and I am not scum," Jayce said solemnly after a long silence.

  "When would we get married?" Haley giggled. "Let's see, I am sixteen now. You are eighteen. I go to college in two years. I don't know about marriage now."

  "I meant in the future," Jayce looked at her with adoration in his eyes. "I think you are the only girl for me."

  Haley smiled. "I think you are the only guy for me too."

  She got up from her hammock and lay on top of Jayce, her long skirt wrapping around his legs. Her father made sure that she dressed like a frump most of the time and today was no exception.

  She was in a long, shapeless skirt that was impossibly hot in the summer time. She was thinking of keeping a separate wardrobe at Jayce's house, with modern clothes that girls her age wore. She was saving up her lunch money to buy different pieces.

  "I'll wear a forest green wedding dress," Haley said softly, resting her head on his rapidly beating heart.

  "And we'll march to Ain't it Enough by Maxi Priest," Jayce said, kissing her on her forehead.

  Haley wrinkled her nose. "My dad would veto that. Oh Perfect Love is more his style."

  "He'd veto your forest green wedding dress." Jayce retorted. "He would insist on white since you are his only daughter to legitimately wear white at a wedding, and he would want to see your virgin’s blood on the sheets before he rested that night."

  They both chuckled.

  Haley looked up at Jayce. "Your eyes are so sexy."

  "Sexy?" Jayce mused. "That is a bad, bad word, Miss Greenwald, it contains sex."

  "I mean it." Haley crawled up his chest until she was nose to nose with him. She stared at his lips.

  "Are you trying to end up like your sisters?" Jayce whispered. "Pastor Greenwald would definitely kill me."

  "No," Haley smiled, "I just want to kiss you."

  "Kiss?" Jayce said, alarmed. "You do understand that my dad is in the house, don't you?"

  "Yep, but he is watching TV," Haley giggled. "I want you to kiss me like in the movies. Teach me."

  Jayce cleared his throat. "You do realize that I have no experience whatsoever about how that goes, don't you?"

  "Let's learn together." Haley pressed her lips to his.

  They tasted like the soda pop that she had been drinking earlier. He opened his mouth to hers and they quickly learned what it felt like to kiss. They were so lost in their exploration of each other that it was only when The General cleared his throat above them that they broke apart.

  "Break it up," The General said sternly.

  They both looked at him guiltily. "You two, in the house in two minutes, when you get yourselves together," he said gruffly.

  Haley smoothed back her hair and got up from the hammock. "Is he going to beat us?" She had a look of fear in her eyes.

  "No!" Jayce said, getting up from the hammock. "My father wouldn't do that. I can't remember ever getting a beating from him when I was younger, much less now that I am eighteen. Relax."

  He linked his arms to hers.

  "Is he going to tell my dad?"

  "I doubt it," Jayce said worriedly. His father had unconventional ways of making a point: demonstrations and reenactments. His father was a closet drama king. Jayce hoped he didn't scare Haley with his no-holds-barred way of doing things.

  When they entered the living room where The General was sitting, he said to them, "Sit down." He indicated the chair before him.

  He was drinking a very tall bottle of water and he took several big gulps before he pointed at the two of them. Beads of sweat were gathering on his forehead. He and Jayce shared the same hooded eyes and straight nose; his thick, level brows looked like they were groomed. Haley was looking at him fearfully and expecting him to explode at any minute.

  "You two have to get the talk."

  "Oh no, Dad," Jayce said, shuddering. "You gave me the talk already."

  "But the only thing left for you two to do out there was to remove your clothes and then fit all the parts together," The General said sternly, "in the backyard, in broad daylight with Miss Green's poodle looking on. Anyway, this talk is mostly for Haley." His father drank from the bottle again and after a short pause said, "I have a very strong suspicion that your father has a stick up his anus where sex is concerned."

  Haley nodded and giggled.

  "Here are the facts." The General put down the water. "Sex is a bonding agent like glue. I guess God made it so to develop a special intimacy with that special someone. It's also a lovely experience; don't listen to the prudes and the naysayers who talk about it like it's something dirty. I guess they never got good loving."

  Haley choked with laughter.

  Jayce just rolled his eyes. He was used to his father's frank, no-holds-barred, blunt way of speaking.

  "Sex is sweet, or it can be sweet with the right person and done in the right setting and I believe at the right age." The General cleared his throat. "It's also an incredible responsibility because it comes with reproductive ties and it is also one of the easiest ways to get diseases. Serious diseases. I don't believe in the new age way of just giving young people condoms and telling them to be careful.

  "I think adults should tell them what an awesome responsibility it is to be bonded with another person before they dispense protection. Adults love the easy way out too much because they hate dealing with the sex topic and maybe because they messed up in their own sexual relationships.

  "So Haley," he looked at her kindly, "I trust Jayce. He's my boy but I know he has serious feelings for you and I know you have feelings for him and sometimes you both may want to go further than kissing.


  "All I am saying is that you both consider the consequences. You are both too young to even know if you'll end up together and so I beseech you not to go further than kissing until you both know for sure what you are getting yourself into.

  "You may go now," he said, fanning them away. He picked up the remote.

  Jayce looked at Haley. She had an embarrassed grin on her face.

  "That's it?" she whispered when they were in the backyard, once more swinging in the hammock.

  "No," Jayce said wryly. "That was it for you. For the rest of the week I am going to get spontaneous lectures about sex and sexually transmitted diseases, and he is going to show me pictures of diseased vaginas at breakfast." He groaned. "I am too old for diseased vaginas at breakfast. It is going to be super weird."

  "I wish I had your dad," Haley said feelingly. "My dad is abusive and he gets all weird when he hears the word sex. Even diseased vaginas would be welcome at breakfast instead of what I have to go through now."

  "My father is as straight-shooting as they come. He is pretty okay, isn't he?" Jayce grudgingly admitted.

  "Yep." Haley got up from her hammock and came to lie on top of him again. "It's better over here."

  "Isn't it?" Jayce murmured, holding her closer to him.

  *****

  Abigail was jerked from her memories when a car door slammed outside her door. She hugged her other pillow close to her and closed her eyes, imagining that the pillow was Jayce. She had always loved to cuddle up to him.

  She needed to sleep. She could feel the dragging weariness behind her eyes. She wished that she were in a quieter community like where Jayce lived. She wondered if he was sleeping now or if he was thinking about her when she was younger or now when she was older, with a different face.

  She wondered who he found more attractive, her or Haley. She then realized how absolutely ridiculous her thoughts were. She drifted off into a troubled sleep.

  Chapter Eight

  Jayce got up at dawn, fifteen minutes before his alarm went off. He hadn't slept much last night. He groggily dragged his gym clothes from a basket in the corner of the huge master bedroom. The room only had his two suitcases, his laundry basket, and a double bed, which looked ridiculously small in the master bedroom that could comfortably hold a king-sized bed.

  He washed his clothes over at Logan's house these days. Melody had recently sent over his basket with the clothes all folded neatly and color-coordinated. He ruffled through the neat stack, pulling clothes out without regard for the order in which she had placed them. He offered a silent, groggy apology to Melody for the disregard to her much-appreciated work.

  He stumbled to the bathroom and brushed his teeth. He needed to do some things today. He needed to see about furnishing his house. He needed to build a backbone where Abigail was concerned and do as she said and forget that he had kissed her and called her Haley, and he needed to work on un-liking her.

  He couldn't be in a cloak and dagger kind of relationship where he had to wade through secrets and games; that was not his type of thing. He wondered if he could accomplish un-liking Abigail.

  He looked in the mirror. His eyes still looked sleepy but this morning was The General's morning for them to go jogging on the beach. Losing weight had been the easy part, he realized, while stretching and trying to dislodge the kink that was in his neck. He yawned widely instead and looked at his bed longingly.

  What sort of madness had gripped him to want to look as ripped and athletic as his father and his friends? Every one of them looked like they had stepped off the cover of some girlie magazine and he thought that he should too.

  He lifted his shirt and looked at his abs front on. He could already see the definition, where hopefully a six-pack would emerge. His belly was wondrously flat now; he hadn't seen it like that since his early twenties. It had a puckered scar where the bullet had grazed him—his war wound. Not even The General had one of those.

  He flexed his biceps and found that there was some power behind them. They were not as big as Ian's, but surely they were comparable to Logan's? He moved from the mirror and headed downstairs to the kitchen for a banana. His father hammered on the door before he could reach the kitchen, and he opened it.

  "Morning General," he said, blinking rapidly as the cool air from the morning came rushing in. "You look to be in fine form today."

  "Morning," his father growled. "You still look sleepy."

  "Rough night," Jayce said over his shoulder as he headed for the kitchen. "I couldn't settle. Can we go lighter today? Have some pity on me."

  "No." The General looked shocked at his request. "Sleep or no, privates have to be ready for the battlefield and they have to be alert."

  "But the thing is," Jayce said, swallowing the banana in two bites, "we are not at war. I am just a regular old civilian with woman problems."

  "Really?" his father said. "You have finally found a woman? I was beginning to worry about you."

  "Why?" Jayce said, grabbing his water bottle.

  "Because, you know," his father shrugged, "you are thirty-four. When a man is single and still a virgin at thirty-four one gets concerned. Especially if you aren't looking for a partner and have no desire to...er...find one. I must admit I saw my lineage stopping with you. "

  "I should never have told you last year that I was a virgin," Jayce sighed. "You bring it up in every single conversation. I ask you what you are drinking you say virgin Daiquiri, virgin smoothie, virgin water and then give me the side-eye like I am a freak. You are partly responsible for me still being a virgin, with your constant emphasis on sex being meaningful and me having a pigeon heart and all of that nonsense."

  "I was teasing," his father chuckled, "and I still stand by what I said. I applaud you for it, even. In this day and age you are a pearl among men."

  "Pearl among men. Really?" Jayce shook his head. "I don't trust you when you get poetic."

  "So who's the woman?" his father asked when they stepped outside and Jayce locked the front of the house.

  "Abigail," Jayce said sheepishly. "I kissed her last night and called her Haley. I was an idiot."

  His father chuckled. "Abigail, your secretary? She's a beauty, isn't she?"

  "Yes," Jayce said, "and you are missing the point. I called her Haley."

  "Then tell her that Haley is an old, old, old high school friend and your subconscious made a mistake." The General frowned. "Surely she'll understand."

  The General picked up pace as they walked downhill toward the beach. At this time in the morning, only a few vehicles were on the road. They passed other die-hard joggers who were struggling up the hill.

  Jayce said worriedly, "I think I am making all the wrong moves with Abby and I think she is withdrawing from me. Added to that, she's so mysterious. I don't know anything about her background, family, friends—nothing. The only thing I know is that she was once married to a wealthy man, she eats raisins with her porridge and she loves landscaping."

  The General looked at him, puzzled. "You didn't do a background check on her like you said you would, did you?"

  "No," Jayce said, "I wanted her to confide in me. I didn't want to go snooping in her life like some kind of peeping tom."

  "She works for us, Jayce." They crossed the road together and walked on rocks down to the sand. "You know we have a strict policy about researching backgrounds. How did I make that slip?"

  "Because I told you I'd do it," Jayce said sullenly.

  "Do it!" his father said, heading off down the beach. "Maybe then she'll not be so mysterious to you."

  Jayce ran effortlessly to keep pace with his father, something that he thought he wouldn't be able to do in a million years.

  *****

  Jayce entered the office earlier than usual. Abigail wasn't in yet, nor did he expect her to be. He was the only one in the building apart from the security guards in the lobby. He had taken up most of the six-mile run with his father thinking about Abigail Petri.

  He
had promised her that he wouldn't have his father snoop into her background but he hadn't said he wouldn't. He was approaching this on a technicality but he felt guilty about doing it.

  He sat at his computer and brought up her information from HR. Abigail Petri, Age 28, Birthday: Feb 1, Previous Employers: Searock Cafe, 1 year. No references. The Golden Gate address. Her resume was as uninformative and as dry as he had thought the moment he had seen it. There was nothing new on it, nothing that he didn't already know.

  He logged into the Intelligence Network and entered her name. If she had worked for anyone else, had a credit card, email address, used the Internet or anything like that, he would have access to that information.

  After he hit enter a pang of regret found its way to the surface of his mind. It should not have come to this; he shouldn't have to search like this and ferret out information about her like she was some criminal. He saw two Abigail Petris come up on the screen. The first one had a Kingston address. That was it. She had no credit history, no work history—nothing.

  The second one was 86 years old and had a nursing home address. He frowned at the screen. Nobody lived off the grid in this day and age, unless they had something to hide or were so old fashioned that they left no trace in a database somewhere. This was what his father would call a red flag. In the normal course of doing a background check, Abigail Petri would have been a code red. Highly likely to be a person involved in fraud.

  He closed his eyes and swung in his chair gently. What had he gotten himself into?

  What was she hiding, and more importantly, who was she?

  "Hey Jayce." He cracked his eye open. It was Rashida, their newest staff member. She was a corporate security investigator. She was waving to him from the door.

  "Hey Rashida," he smiled at her pleasantly. "You are here ridiculously early."